I just wanted to say real quickly that i hope you all have a lovely Christmas tomorrow!
Today, Grandma and Grandpa are coming over for a late lunch/early dinner. Tomorrow we're going over to the Watts' house for the afternoon/evening. I am very very excited.
This Christmas is a little different, because of Papa, but it will all work out. I feel very blessed to have both my Grandparents. With Grandpa having brain surgery in the late spring, and Papa and all his heart problems recently, it is amazing.
The twins Nathan and I have been having so much fun guessing what's under the tree! I can't wait!
I hope you all have a terrific Christmas!
And say Merry Christmas, not Happy Holidays. Happy Holidays REALLY bugs me.
-Katie
Friday, December 24, 2010
Tuesday, December 07, 2010
Today I saw a brand new baby girl, and a dying man . . .
How do you know when to hold on with all you've got, and when to let go?
And what is death like? And how do you comfort someone who is losing someone?
Isn't it interesting, how life goes in circles. When you're born, you need to be taken care of, you can't stand for yourself. And when you are dying, you need to be taken care of, and you can't stand by yourself.
Pray for Papa. He isn't doing very well.
And what is death like? And how do you comfort someone who is losing someone?
Isn't it interesting, how life goes in circles. When you're born, you need to be taken care of, you can't stand for yourself. And when you are dying, you need to be taken care of, and you can't stand by yourself.
Pray for Papa. He isn't doing very well.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
These are a few of my favorite things:
On Sunday, one of our bunnies died. The tan one. Her name was whisper. A moment of silence for our bunny. We remember the whisper of her. ;) This picture was taken a few days before she died.
I've been having so much fun with the camera recently! This was on a walk with the twins.
She is so beautiful.
I got a really good picture of him!!!
The twins are so cute, I love taking pictures of them :)
Coming soon . . . .
I just wanted to let you all know, I do plan on putting up a post soon! I have been kinda busy, but I will do it!
Thursday, October 28, 2010
To read or not to read
OK, so I need some advice/help. Elaina and I were discussing the topic of reading books with magic in it. It's pretty controversial in our circles. So, tell me. Why would you read/not read books with magic in it? Tell me all your reasons! I hear opinions, but it is never well explained.
Like, why is some magic OK, but not all?
And what is wrong with reading magic? (or at least, in YOUR opinion, why don't you?)
Why is it not wrong to read magic? (in your opinion)
any feedback would be really helpful!
Like, why is some magic OK, but not all?
And what is wrong with reading magic? (or at least, in YOUR opinion, why don't you?)
Why is it not wrong to read magic? (in your opinion)
any feedback would be really helpful!
Monday, October 04, 2010
Out here, all on my own
So, I really should be doing school, but I have the writing bug.
Bethany and MJ have both started Running Start now. I am officially the oldest child at the house. Most the time. Michaela is gone from 8:30 till 1:30ish, and then she goes upstairs and does homework, and then goes to Cross Country. She comes back in time for dinner, and then does more homework. She is so busy all the time! We both have been planning on going through our coats and scarves, but just can't find the time to do it!
Bethany leaves at 8:30 with Michaela, and on Mondays and Wednesdays gets back at 4:45ish. On the other days, she comes home at 2:45ish. She is home more, but does homework upstairs a lot.
It's weird, how easy it is to slip into having busy sisters. I see them a lot, but it is different than last year, or the year before. I admit, I have been pretty "woe is me" these past 2 weeks. But I am getting over it. Actually, it is kinda exciting just being me and the twins and Nathan. We argue, but I think are having more fun together. If I am really upset, I talk to Nathan now. I never have done that before.
At the beginning of the school year, I was talking to MJ about how hard these next two years are going to be. She said that last year was hard for her, but a lot of things happened to her, that couldn't of happened if she had done running start early.
So, how's school going for you? How's life?
Well, I better get to school. Bye!
Bethany and MJ have both started Running Start now. I am officially the oldest child at the house. Most the time. Michaela is gone from 8:30 till 1:30ish, and then she goes upstairs and does homework, and then goes to Cross Country. She comes back in time for dinner, and then does more homework. She is so busy all the time! We both have been planning on going through our coats and scarves, but just can't find the time to do it!
Bethany leaves at 8:30 with Michaela, and on Mondays and Wednesdays gets back at 4:45ish. On the other days, she comes home at 2:45ish. She is home more, but does homework upstairs a lot.
It's weird, how easy it is to slip into having busy sisters. I see them a lot, but it is different than last year, or the year before. I admit, I have been pretty "woe is me" these past 2 weeks. But I am getting over it. Actually, it is kinda exciting just being me and the twins and Nathan. We argue, but I think are having more fun together. If I am really upset, I talk to Nathan now. I never have done that before.
At the beginning of the school year, I was talking to MJ about how hard these next two years are going to be. She said that last year was hard for her, but a lot of things happened to her, that couldn't of happened if she had done running start early.
So, how's school going for you? How's life?
Well, I better get to school. Bye!
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Misplaced modifiers
Nathan and I love misplaced modifiers. They are really funny, and we both get them a lot in our school. So we put a bunch of them together. And they make us laugh. :D
He told us about driving stock cars in english class.
You may have received a package from your uncle in the mail box.
Several students were punished after the rules had been broken by the teacher.
He killed a snake that was crossing the road with his rifle.
The reporters saw the the player kick a field goal from the press box.
I saw the newsboy throwing newspapers through my front window.
I read about the robot who went to Mars in a recent magazine.
The crook was arrested after the bank had been robbed by the police.
We waved to the man cutting the lawn from our window.
In the sink, I noticed the water was still running.
While riding to Gettysburg on a scrap of brown paper, Lincoln wrote a famous speech.
Today a man told us about his encounters with wild animals from a mission board.
The Swan swam in the lake, white and graceful.
A woman stood on the sidewalk in a red silk dress.
A man looked at several used cars with false teeth.
A cowboy was riding a beautiful stallion with a ten-gallon hat on his head.
The question baffled the students on the chalk board.
That man just became a father of a baby boy in the brown suit.
The boy went to see the dentist with a tooth ache.
Jesus told them three days later He would rise from the dead.
I ordered initialed stationery from the store scented with roses.
The choir sang hymn written by Johnson Oatman, Jr. in church today.
Walking over the sand dunes, the sea oats were scarce.
I told Mother that I would be late for dinner on the telephone.
The runners discussed how to beat their rivals in the locker room.
Caleb told us about the recent nuclear explosion in the physics lab.
She bought an old book written by Beatrice Potter in the used bookstore.
Tim found a picture of Grandpa as a boy in the dresser drawer.
I heard about the massive snowstorm on the radio.
They told us about the Revolutionary War in class on Wednesday.
Lying under the sod, he discovered an antique silver dollar.
The brownies came from Mrs. Spencer with the nuts on top.
I could see the post office looking through my study window.
I could envision the heather on the moors reading the gothic novel.
The lady was standing by the piano in a gray coat.
The librarian gave a book to the man that was over three hundred years old.
General Eisenhower could see the troops peering through his binoculars.
Crumpled up in the wastebasket, she found the receipt.
She watched the snow falling outside her window lying lazily on the couch.
Flopping at the end of his fishing line, Bill saw a large speckled trout.
Mr. Lippert bought a car from the dealer that cost over thirty-thousand dollars.
I will actually write a blog post soon!!!
-Katie
He told us about driving stock cars in english class.
You may have received a package from your uncle in the mail box.
Several students were punished after the rules had been broken by the teacher.
He killed a snake that was crossing the road with his rifle.
The reporters saw the the player kick a field goal from the press box.
I saw the newsboy throwing newspapers through my front window.
I read about the robot who went to Mars in a recent magazine.
The crook was arrested after the bank had been robbed by the police.
We waved to the man cutting the lawn from our window.
In the sink, I noticed the water was still running.
While riding to Gettysburg on a scrap of brown paper, Lincoln wrote a famous speech.
Today a man told us about his encounters with wild animals from a mission board.
The Swan swam in the lake, white and graceful.
A woman stood on the sidewalk in a red silk dress.
A man looked at several used cars with false teeth.
A cowboy was riding a beautiful stallion with a ten-gallon hat on his head.
The question baffled the students on the chalk board.
That man just became a father of a baby boy in the brown suit.
The boy went to see the dentist with a tooth ache.
Jesus told them three days later He would rise from the dead.
I ordered initialed stationery from the store scented with roses.
The choir sang hymn written by Johnson Oatman, Jr. in church today.
Walking over the sand dunes, the sea oats were scarce.
I told Mother that I would be late for dinner on the telephone.
The runners discussed how to beat their rivals in the locker room.
Caleb told us about the recent nuclear explosion in the physics lab.
She bought an old book written by Beatrice Potter in the used bookstore.
Tim found a picture of Grandpa as a boy in the dresser drawer.
I heard about the massive snowstorm on the radio.
They told us about the Revolutionary War in class on Wednesday.
Lying under the sod, he discovered an antique silver dollar.
The brownies came from Mrs. Spencer with the nuts on top.
I could see the post office looking through my study window.
I could envision the heather on the moors reading the gothic novel.
The lady was standing by the piano in a gray coat.
The librarian gave a book to the man that was over three hundred years old.
General Eisenhower could see the troops peering through his binoculars.
Crumpled up in the wastebasket, she found the receipt.
She watched the snow falling outside her window lying lazily on the couch.
Flopping at the end of his fishing line, Bill saw a large speckled trout.
Mr. Lippert bought a car from the dealer that cost over thirty-thousand dollars.
I will actually write a blog post soon!!!
-Katie
Monday, September 06, 2010
Summer 2010
This is LONG overdue, and I am sorry I haven't written sooner!
We had fun on our vacation! There were great beaches, and tall trees, and some terrific family time.
But I'm glad to be back. There's no place like home, right?
Wow, school starts tomorrow. I can't believe this summer went by so fast! Looking back, I think about the highlights.
1. The Carlsons coming out. OH man, It seems like yesterday that I was counting the days for when they would arrive. Now it is all past! But we still have some absolutely amazing memories; like carrying a log all the way from wildwood park to the Watts' house. And swimming, and laughing, and all those things that make it so special. All I can say, is it better not be three years till we see them again :)
2. Camp Hope!
I grew a lot during camp. Not up, but spiritually. I learned things I hadn't ever thought about. I had great time with friends. And went home in disbelief of how quickly it went. I had so much fun, and can not wait for next year!
3. Eric's Birthday. We went to a surprise birthday party for Eric's 16th. It was so much fun!!!!!!!!!!! One of my favorite groups of people, just hanging out, and being noisy, and having tons of fun. To me, it was sorta the end of summer.
4. Our family vacation. It was so much fun, and we had some great family time. Charging up for this year of craziness.
So, tomorrow school starts, and my Summer Vacation is officially over. But I am actually looking forward to this year. For school I am doing
Algebra 1-OK, this I am not so excited for :)
Chemistry-Not so bad. I'm gonna give it my best shot!
Literature through Movies-I get to watch a movie once every two weeks, and write about it! Mostly classic movies. I'm really excited!!
Literature Reading-kinda boring.
Northwest History-Yah, we'll see how that is.
All-American History- From the Civil War to the end of the Cold War, which is my favorite time in history!
Mom has this Old Testament Review that I am going to do, but I don't really think of that as school.
Spanish-I hope to actually be able to have a conversation by the end of this year.
Piano-yah yah yah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So, what are you guys doing for school this year???
Have a great Labor Day!
We had fun on our vacation! There were great beaches, and tall trees, and some terrific family time.
But I'm glad to be back. There's no place like home, right?
Wow, school starts tomorrow. I can't believe this summer went by so fast! Looking back, I think about the highlights.
1. The Carlsons coming out. OH man, It seems like yesterday that I was counting the days for when they would arrive. Now it is all past! But we still have some absolutely amazing memories; like carrying a log all the way from wildwood park to the Watts' house. And swimming, and laughing, and all those things that make it so special. All I can say, is it better not be three years till we see them again :)
2. Camp Hope!
I grew a lot during camp. Not up, but spiritually. I learned things I hadn't ever thought about. I had great time with friends. And went home in disbelief of how quickly it went. I had so much fun, and can not wait for next year!
3. Eric's Birthday. We went to a surprise birthday party for Eric's 16th. It was so much fun!!!!!!!!!!! One of my favorite groups of people, just hanging out, and being noisy, and having tons of fun. To me, it was sorta the end of summer.
4. Our family vacation. It was so much fun, and we had some great family time. Charging up for this year of craziness.
So, tomorrow school starts, and my Summer Vacation is officially over. But I am actually looking forward to this year. For school I am doing
Algebra 1-OK, this I am not so excited for :)
Chemistry-Not so bad. I'm gonna give it my best shot!
Literature through Movies-I get to watch a movie once every two weeks, and write about it! Mostly classic movies. I'm really excited!!
Literature Reading-kinda boring.
Northwest History-Yah, we'll see how that is.
All-American History- From the Civil War to the end of the Cold War, which is my favorite time in history!
Mom has this Old Testament Review that I am going to do, but I don't really think of that as school.
Spanish-I hope to actually be able to have a conversation by the end of this year.
Piano-yah yah yah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So, what are you guys doing for school this year???
Have a great Labor Day!
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Sunrise
So, yesterday morning, I got up to see the sunrise, but when I got up, it was light outside. I couldn't actually see the sun, so I sat out there, until it came out.
This morning, I got up earlier, and it was darkish! I watched the world grow light. I journaled and read for about 45 minuets. Then, when it came up, i went back to bed, because I was SO tired.
Yesterday, we had a surprise b-day party for Eric! It was so much fun!
Well, I'm not really making sense, so I am just going to do this:
10 things that make me happy
1. Sunrises and early mornings
2. SLEEP!
3. Seeing friends I only get to see every once in awhile. (Even though they live relatively close. What's up with that?)
4. SUNSHINE!
5. Planning vacations (We're going on a vacation down the oregon coast!)
6. Journaling, and arranging my silly thoughts on paper, so I can sort them out, and when I talk to people, they don't sound so silly.
7. Reading books! Curling up on the couch, and reading a good book.
8. Cold showers on hot days. Because it has been really hot over here.
9. Dreams. Though they are sometimes confusing, and make no sense, they always give you something to think about!
10. Reading the bible, and just .. . thinking
Well, we're going to do some cleaning today, so I should probably get a start on my day! ta ta!
This morning, I got up earlier, and it was darkish! I watched the world grow light. I journaled and read for about 45 minuets. Then, when it came up, i went back to bed, because I was SO tired.
Yesterday, we had a surprise b-day party for Eric! It was so much fun!
Well, I'm not really making sense, so I am just going to do this:
10 things that make me happy
1. Sunrises and early mornings
2. SLEEP!
3. Seeing friends I only get to see every once in awhile. (Even though they live relatively close. What's up with that?)
4. SUNSHINE!
5. Planning vacations (We're going on a vacation down the oregon coast!)
6. Journaling, and arranging my silly thoughts on paper, so I can sort them out, and when I talk to people, they don't sound so silly.
7. Reading books! Curling up on the couch, and reading a good book.
8. Cold showers on hot days. Because it has been really hot over here.
9. Dreams. Though they are sometimes confusing, and make no sense, they always give you something to think about!
10. Reading the bible, and just .. . thinking
Well, we're going to do some cleaning today, so I should probably get a start on my day! ta ta!
Monday, August 09, 2010
"that He gave His only Son .. . "
OK, so I am trying to figure out how I am going to tell you all about this amazing past week. I can't really describe the fun, the learning, the growth . . .all that amazing ness very well. I will do my best, but not quite right now.
I just wanted to say. Hope you all had a great week, and I miss you all so much!
-Katie
I just wanted to say. Hope you all had a great week, and I miss you all so much!
-Katie
Monday, August 02, 2010
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Imagine this, just for a moment. A girl, through some strange circumstances, has not ever stepped outside. Nor seen outside. Ever. She has read about it, and knows what everything is called, but has never seen it in real life.
I run down the hall, my heart beating in my chest. I have barely escaped. I pull open the door, that I know leads to the out doors. I open it, and am in a garage. I know this, because there is a car, that looks exactly like the one in the pictures. And it is messy, filled with bikes, and tools. The garage door, the big one that cars go through, is part way open, and light from what I assume is the sun is coming in. I walk slowly, looking at my bare feet. They warm up, as I pass the line of darkness. I keep walking slowly, marveling in the feeling of light. Light has feeling. I duck under the door, and for the first time in all 14 years of my life, I am completely bathed in golden sunlight, breathing in fresh air, hearing the outside noises. I am outside. I stand there, my back against the garage door, my eyes open wide. I see the sun, the trees, the grass, the deep, open, impossible blue sky. There are birds in the air, and the wind. The wind is amazing. Blowing softly, pushing my hair to a fro, with a mind of its own. Like some invisible force, with a mind of its own. The gravel of the drive way is hard on my feet. I look at the sun. In my first 30 seconds outside, I find that no drawing, no book, can truly give justice to what the outside is like. The sun is magnificent, so big, so bright, so warm. The wind is alive, the world is alive. The sky is so deep blue. I can't see the end of it. There are shouts and screams of children. I look, to make sure they are alright. They are chasing each other, running in circles. Playing. There is a gentle hum in the distance. Never ending, just there. It must be where cars are. I explore with my eyes, drinking it in. Questioning, wondering, understanding everything. Colors are so much more vibrant. They have a quality of life to them. Standing in the sun, for the first time in my life, I understand what it is to live, and to be free.
Well, that's all. Bye!
I run down the hall, my heart beating in my chest. I have barely escaped. I pull open the door, that I know leads to the out doors. I open it, and am in a garage. I know this, because there is a car, that looks exactly like the one in the pictures. And it is messy, filled with bikes, and tools. The garage door, the big one that cars go through, is part way open, and light from what I assume is the sun is coming in. I walk slowly, looking at my bare feet. They warm up, as I pass the line of darkness. I keep walking slowly, marveling in the feeling of light. Light has feeling. I duck under the door, and for the first time in all 14 years of my life, I am completely bathed in golden sunlight, breathing in fresh air, hearing the outside noises. I am outside. I stand there, my back against the garage door, my eyes open wide. I see the sun, the trees, the grass, the deep, open, impossible blue sky. There are birds in the air, and the wind. The wind is amazing. Blowing softly, pushing my hair to a fro, with a mind of its own. Like some invisible force, with a mind of its own. The gravel of the drive way is hard on my feet. I look at the sun. In my first 30 seconds outside, I find that no drawing, no book, can truly give justice to what the outside is like. The sun is magnificent, so big, so bright, so warm. The wind is alive, the world is alive. The sky is so deep blue. I can't see the end of it. There are shouts and screams of children. I look, to make sure they are alright. They are chasing each other, running in circles. Playing. There is a gentle hum in the distance. Never ending, just there. It must be where cars are. I explore with my eyes, drinking it in. Questioning, wondering, understanding everything. Colors are so much more vibrant. They have a quality of life to them. Standing in the sun, for the first time in my life, I understand what it is to live, and to be free.
Well, that's all. Bye!
Thursday, July 08, 2010
beautiful sunny days, and bug bites`
I'm at the Watts house, and just got out of the pool. I am coming down with a cold :P But, we are having so much fun. I would love to go into detail, but that would take hours. But we have had fun, doing crazy stuff, like carrying 37 foot trees, and making songs, and running around, and swimming, and having water fights. Julie and Sheryl leave tomorrow. I wish they could stay forever. But this whole month has been exuasting. I am always ready for change. But I wish that the Carlsons could stay forever. I have learned so much about myself so far this summer. I have learned more about my cousins. I have learned to let go, and let live. To help more.
Grandpa is still in the hospital. Mom has been really sad about it. If I cry, I want to cry in private. So I have cried a little, but mostly when I am alone. All us cousins prayed for Grandpa one day. Nathan prayed that dad would know its OK to cry. I think it is strange in some way, that we were all so suprised that Grandpa is sick. Everyone dies. Everyone gets old, and has troubles. You must all think I am heartless, the way I am talking about it. Really, I am not. It doesn't seem real to me I guess. We all are born, live life to the best we can. We do things, we accomplish little goals, and big goals. We live each day, appreciating the things in it. Little moments, small happinesses, and sadness. When you look at one week, or a month, it seems to much. Don't let the big picture overwhelm you. I wake up every morning. And live it. And my life will pass. And I might not change the world. But I will live it. Day by day, week by week, month by month, year by year. And I will die. I wonder what I will leave behind me. What my "legacy" will be.
Well, it's dinner time. So I gotta go.
well . . . .
Bye!!
-Katie
Grandpa is still in the hospital. Mom has been really sad about it. If I cry, I want to cry in private. So I have cried a little, but mostly when I am alone. All us cousins prayed for Grandpa one day. Nathan prayed that dad would know its OK to cry. I think it is strange in some way, that we were all so suprised that Grandpa is sick. Everyone dies. Everyone gets old, and has troubles. You must all think I am heartless, the way I am talking about it. Really, I am not. It doesn't seem real to me I guess. We all are born, live life to the best we can. We do things, we accomplish little goals, and big goals. We live each day, appreciating the things in it. Little moments, small happinesses, and sadness. When you look at one week, or a month, it seems to much. Don't let the big picture overwhelm you. I wake up every morning. And live it. And my life will pass. And I might not change the world. But I will live it. Day by day, week by week, month by month, year by year. And I will die. I wonder what I will leave behind me. What my "legacy" will be.
Well, it's dinner time. So I gotta go.
well . . . .
Bye!!
-Katie
Monday, June 28, 2010
I'm not sure what to call this
I want to tell you a story. It is very sad.
My Grandpa is having trouble with his right hand. He can't sign his name very well. And his speech is slurred. This is all the result of brain surgery. He has been better, but the past few days haven't been very good. Today is Grandma and Grandpa's 48th wedding anniversary.
I was at their house, and Grandma was gone, when he got up to do his exercises. It consists of playing with putty, and using building blocks, ect. He realized that he had left his anniversary gift at the office, so he called and was talking to Miss Kate, telling her where it was. She found it, and was describing it to him. "It's a box, in a Johnson Jewelers bag, it looks like it is a bracelet, and has gold ribbon on it." Grandpa said "yes, that must be it. You can bring it over, and if it isn't the right one, you can run back and look again." I found that funny. You know, Grandpa has tons of Jewelry bags behind his desk. She brought it over, and, it was the right one.
He went and found the card he had got for her. It was very sweet. He got out his big crayons, that are easier for him to hold, and signed his name, Love Gene. It was like a 3 year olds signature. Messy and big. Then, with the same red crayon, he wrote Sylvia on the envelope, and From Gene. I have seen a lot of really sad things recently. But seeing Grandpa sign his name, and his barely readable signature. That made me almost cry. Because 48 years later, he still loves grandma, and he loves her so much, he had the forethought to buy her a anniversary gift 3 weeks before his anniversary, and signed it, even though it is barely readable.
Life has so much more than feeling sorry for yourself. So live life. And live it to the glory of God.
My Grandpa is having trouble with his right hand. He can't sign his name very well. And his speech is slurred. This is all the result of brain surgery. He has been better, but the past few days haven't been very good. Today is Grandma and Grandpa's 48th wedding anniversary.
I was at their house, and Grandma was gone, when he got up to do his exercises. It consists of playing with putty, and using building blocks, ect. He realized that he had left his anniversary gift at the office, so he called and was talking to Miss Kate, telling her where it was. She found it, and was describing it to him. "It's a box, in a Johnson Jewelers bag, it looks like it is a bracelet, and has gold ribbon on it." Grandpa said "yes, that must be it. You can bring it over, and if it isn't the right one, you can run back and look again." I found that funny. You know, Grandpa has tons of Jewelry bags behind his desk. She brought it over, and, it was the right one.
He went and found the card he had got for her. It was very sweet. He got out his big crayons, that are easier for him to hold, and signed his name, Love Gene. It was like a 3 year olds signature. Messy and big. Then, with the same red crayon, he wrote Sylvia on the envelope, and From Gene. I have seen a lot of really sad things recently. But seeing Grandpa sign his name, and his barely readable signature. That made me almost cry. Because 48 years later, he still loves grandma, and he loves her so much, he had the forethought to buy her a anniversary gift 3 weeks before his anniversary, and signed it, even though it is barely readable.
Life has so much more than feeling sorry for yourself. So live life. And live it to the glory of God.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Monday, June 07, 2010
May God give me the strength . . .
Real quickly, totally unrelated to my previous post:
My Grandpa is having brain surgery tomorrow morning at 8:00. Please pray that he will do well, that God will guide the surgeon's hands, that Grandma will be alright, and that God will give us all strength.
Thanks!
-KT
My Grandpa is having brain surgery tomorrow morning at 8:00. Please pray that he will do well, that God will guide the surgeon's hands, that Grandma will be alright, and that God will give us all strength.
Thanks!
-KT
Friday, June 04, 2010
10 hard things.
So, on the way home from dance last night, I had this great story idea. This girl has a dream, and in the dream, she almost dies. Just before she dies, 10 images flash infront of her. Different people, different things she had done wrong. The next morning, she got up, and fixed them. Appologized to the people. ect. ect. I can just imagine the little description on the back of the book.
"Caroline Stuart had 10 things to finish. 10 things that if she died, would be left, hurting people, leaving them broken. After her dream that night, she had to go and finish them. Them all. Even the hard ones. Through a broken road of tears, friends, and people she has hurt, Caroline finds that love is beautiful, God is great, and friends are irreplacable."
Sounds great. I was really excited about this idea, thinking about it, putting real life examples into it. I was thinking about 10 things I would want to change. At first, I didn't think I would be able to find 10. But I was surprised as the kept adding up. And then, I realized I should do it. Do 10 really hard things. Apologize to people I have wronged, fix things.
As we kept driving, I realized the first one I should do. The most important one. OH man. This is gonna be hard. The first one, is God.
Thing One:
I say I am saved. But I don't really act that way. I am such a sinner! That moment, in the car, I fixed my eye on a star, and prayed. I didn't plead with God to save me. I just said that I wanted to do God's will, and I wanted to live as a christian. Help me Lord. Without you, I can do nothing. I can't just say, "OK, one hard thing done." I have to keep going. You guys, pray for me. I have ALWAYS wanted to be a christian. But today it dawned on me. I can't just WAIT for my "christan-ness" to suddenly grow, and bloom out of me. I have to pray, and actually try. Sweat and tears. "Lord God, please help me to grow in you, put inside me a eager desire to love you, to worship you, and to obey me. I have knocked on the door. Please, open it."
I'm thinking of these 10 hard things. I am cringing already, at how hard this is going to be. It isn't 10 hard things. It is 10 really really really really really really really really really really really hard things. I know, that with God as my strength, I can do it. The things might surprise you. They aren't all related to people.
Please pray for me. Pray that I will worship God, obey Him, be a shining light in the world, and be strong and true as I fix these 10 things, that to a normal person may look minor, but really, are things that I should have tried to fix a long time ago.
-Katie Claire
P.S. (I am NOT saying that I ONLY have 10 things I need to fix. I know I have many many many many more sins)
"Caroline Stuart had 10 things to finish. 10 things that if she died, would be left, hurting people, leaving them broken. After her dream that night, she had to go and finish them. Them all. Even the hard ones. Through a broken road of tears, friends, and people she has hurt, Caroline finds that love is beautiful, God is great, and friends are irreplacable."
Sounds great. I was really excited about this idea, thinking about it, putting real life examples into it. I was thinking about 10 things I would want to change. At first, I didn't think I would be able to find 10. But I was surprised as the kept adding up. And then, I realized I should do it. Do 10 really hard things. Apologize to people I have wronged, fix things.
As we kept driving, I realized the first one I should do. The most important one. OH man. This is gonna be hard. The first one, is God.
Thing One:
I say I am saved. But I don't really act that way. I am such a sinner! That moment, in the car, I fixed my eye on a star, and prayed. I didn't plead with God to save me. I just said that I wanted to do God's will, and I wanted to live as a christian. Help me Lord. Without you, I can do nothing. I can't just say, "OK, one hard thing done." I have to keep going. You guys, pray for me. I have ALWAYS wanted to be a christian. But today it dawned on me. I can't just WAIT for my "christan-ness" to suddenly grow, and bloom out of me. I have to pray, and actually try. Sweat and tears. "Lord God, please help me to grow in you, put inside me a eager desire to love you, to worship you, and to obey me. I have knocked on the door. Please, open it."
I'm thinking of these 10 hard things. I am cringing already, at how hard this is going to be. It isn't 10 hard things. It is 10 really really really really really really really really really really really hard things. I know, that with God as my strength, I can do it. The things might surprise you. They aren't all related to people.
Please pray for me. Pray that I will worship God, obey Him, be a shining light in the world, and be strong and true as I fix these 10 things, that to a normal person may look minor, but really, are things that I should have tried to fix a long time ago.
-Katie Claire
P.S. (I am NOT saying that I ONLY have 10 things I need to fix. I know I have many many many many more sins)
Tuesday, June 01, 2010
and for some reason, I wanted to cry
Friday:
At the Northwest church, 45 minuets before our big Fire and Ice performance, Susan gets us all warming up. We play follow the leader. Out of the woodwork, from their chairs, the balcony, the stage, the hallway, girls and boys dressed in their costumes start running. We look like a army of colorful kids, running in time to awesome music.
7:30 our performance starts. Elaina and I are helping line up all the kids. We get them in their line for their performance, and send them on stage with a smile, and last whispered instructions. I try not to be to bossy. It's is nice to keep my mind occupied, before our dance.
Line up Senior company. Line up little kids. Line up Senior company again. Line up teen company. Line up senior company. Finally, line up ourselves. Young teen company. All 16 of us. We walk up back stage. The dance before us is ending. This is the worst part. I feel like I could throw up. Last minuet dress checks, and then we start to walk on. I take a deep breath and straighten my shoulders just before the hot stage lights light me up. Magicaly, I'm not nervous. It's awkward, just standing there, until the music starts. And then we start dancing. And I smile, because it is so much fun.
Monday, Memorial Day:
We have a 30 minuet performance. I line the kids up again. We dance our dance. The whole performance is fun. I love lining people up. Everytime Senior company comes backstage from their performances, Mary Beth looks like she has been crying. After 8 years of dancing with Fire and Ice, she deserves to cry at her farewell performance. The last song. I am basically crying for Mary Beth, and Kirsten, and all the girls who I barely know, but are dancing for the last time. The song ends. Senior company comes back. And we all leave. Just like that. This season of Fire and Ice Irish Dance Company performances is over. We meet our parents, they tell us how amazing we were, but we are all quiet. And I still feel like crying. Crying for all the girls who are done, crying for the end of our performing season.
Now, I know. I can't not dance. I never have LOVED dance. But I do now. I wanna get into senior company. And dance like Mary Beth, and Elizabeth, and all those really good girls. I want to dance forever, and deserve to cry when I am done. So I dance.
I look back on the dance year. I know that there are several girls in my class who don't like me very much. If I could start over doing that class, I would do it so differently. I would act like myself. Not someone else. I would be friendly, not standoffish. All those friday evenings I spent dancing, when my family was at home watching a movie. All those sleep overs I could have had, that didn't work out because of dance. All those events I missed. Well, it's basically over Katie. Was it worth it?
I love to perform. I love to dance. I love to shine. Even with the missed friday evenings, the hard work, the girls there that seemed to hate me at first. I would do it all over again. I would do it all over again. Just to dance. Just to perform. Just to be there.
So yes, I will do Fire and Ice next year. I will dance next year. And it will be amazing, and I will dance. That's all I need to say. I will dance.
At the Northwest church, 45 minuets before our big Fire and Ice performance, Susan gets us all warming up. We play follow the leader. Out of the woodwork, from their chairs, the balcony, the stage, the hallway, girls and boys dressed in their costumes start running. We look like a army of colorful kids, running in time to awesome music.
7:30 our performance starts. Elaina and I are helping line up all the kids. We get them in their line for their performance, and send them on stage with a smile, and last whispered instructions. I try not to be to bossy. It's is nice to keep my mind occupied, before our dance.
Line up Senior company. Line up little kids. Line up Senior company again. Line up teen company. Line up senior company. Finally, line up ourselves. Young teen company. All 16 of us. We walk up back stage. The dance before us is ending. This is the worst part. I feel like I could throw up. Last minuet dress checks, and then we start to walk on. I take a deep breath and straighten my shoulders just before the hot stage lights light me up. Magicaly, I'm not nervous. It's awkward, just standing there, until the music starts. And then we start dancing. And I smile, because it is so much fun.
Monday, Memorial Day:
We have a 30 minuet performance. I line the kids up again. We dance our dance. The whole performance is fun. I love lining people up. Everytime Senior company comes backstage from their performances, Mary Beth looks like she has been crying. After 8 years of dancing with Fire and Ice, she deserves to cry at her farewell performance. The last song. I am basically crying for Mary Beth, and Kirsten, and all the girls who I barely know, but are dancing for the last time. The song ends. Senior company comes back. And we all leave. Just like that. This season of Fire and Ice Irish Dance Company performances is over. We meet our parents, they tell us how amazing we were, but we are all quiet. And I still feel like crying. Crying for all the girls who are done, crying for the end of our performing season.
Now, I know. I can't not dance. I never have LOVED dance. But I do now. I wanna get into senior company. And dance like Mary Beth, and Elizabeth, and all those really good girls. I want to dance forever, and deserve to cry when I am done. So I dance.
I look back on the dance year. I know that there are several girls in my class who don't like me very much. If I could start over doing that class, I would do it so differently. I would act like myself. Not someone else. I would be friendly, not standoffish. All those friday evenings I spent dancing, when my family was at home watching a movie. All those sleep overs I could have had, that didn't work out because of dance. All those events I missed. Well, it's basically over Katie. Was it worth it?
I love to perform. I love to dance. I love to shine. Even with the missed friday evenings, the hard work, the girls there that seemed to hate me at first. I would do it all over again. I would do it all over again. Just to dance. Just to perform. Just to be there.
So yes, I will do Fire and Ice next year. I will dance next year. And it will be amazing, and I will dance. That's all I need to say. I will dance.
Monday, May 24, 2010
OK, so I had to write this essay story thing for my grammar. I just felt like putting it up on blog. The title of the story is I was the hero. Yes, a beka grammar is very annoying. :D
I was the hero
I am going to tell you about one of the most incredible experiences of my life. Wait, I am afraid that you have been terribly confused by the title by publisher made me put on this article. I was not the hero. Most definitely not. In fact, I was the complete opposite of "the hero." I was the "un-hero." Who the hero was, is actually a quite discussed topic all over the world. But I will let you decide for yourself, who was the hero.
It all started one boring, lazy, summer day. It was 10:23 in the morning, and I was quietly creeping into my brothers room. With a fog horn. It doesn't take a genius to figure out the rest. By 11:00, I had been unceremoniously dumped in a dumpster outside of the YMCA. Regrettably, I was stuck there. I could have done several things at this point. I could have screamed for help, while plotting revenge against my brother. I could have shrieked like a girl, and pounded on the walls until I got out. I could have cried like a baby, and thrown trash around, making as much noise as possible. I did it all at once. I stopped after about 1 minuet. Well, you try screaming, plotting revenge, shrieking like a girl, pounding the walls, crying like a baby, and making as much noise as possible, all at one time. It is tiring! And, I heard a voice. Yes, I, Colin Smith heard a voice in the dumpster outside of the YMCA.
STOP! You may be on your way to come and pick me up, and drive me to the hospital immediately. Please refrain yourself. I don't need to go to the hospital. The voice wasn't telling me he was my dead ancestors. Nor was the voice telling me that I was about to be sucked up by aliens. The voice said
"OK Bob, we are ready to proceed with plan Pink Prancing Unicorn." You may still think that I am crazy. Please don't judge so quickly! I am not! Because, I know something you don't. I know, that the voice was coming from a walkie talkie.
I fished around for some time in the dumpster, until I found the walkie talkie. I decided to play along with my brothers prank. Once I finally found the walkie talkie, I talked into.
"Proceed." I said. To this day, I wish I had not made the grievous mistake of saying "proceed." Because as soon as I said that, the dumpster started to move. Terrified, I screamed in a terrible panic, afraid that I was going to be dumped into a trash truck, and my bones pulverised into dust. No such luck. I stopped moving up, and started moving forward. Bracing myself against the wall, I could hear screams of other people. Sounds of screeching trucks, and the sound of braking glass. The entire ride was a terrifying confusion movement, smelly trash being thrown in my face, and absolute lack of sense of direction. Finally, I was set down. I grabbed a stick, and knocked on the roof, trying to break out. All this time, Mr. Prancing Pink Unicorn was screaming
"NOT YET!" In the walkie talkie. Finally I broke out. The sounds of confusion and shouting that I had heard outside of the dumpster stopped. I heard nothing, as I climbed out. Finally, I could see over the edge of the dumpster. The sight was shocking. Several men dressed in black were holding guns up to people, who were dressed in fancy clothes. Outside of the building I was in, there were several police men. The sight of me, a young boy, coming out of a dumpster, holding a wooden stick with a banana peel delicately balanced on the tip, was enough to make the evil vagabonds stop. And that second delay was enough for the police to come in. I was hailed a hero! I had stopped one of the most daring bank robberies ever!
But I don't think I was a hero. The only time I ever accept the title of "Hero" is when my brother tries to take credit for the whole thing, since he threw me in the dumpster in the first place. That is the only time. Lets remember, that all I really did, was get thrown in a dumpster, answer a walkie talkie code, take a terrifying ride in a dumpster across main street, crash through glass doors, and stop a armed robbery. That is all.
I was the hero
I am going to tell you about one of the most incredible experiences of my life. Wait, I am afraid that you have been terribly confused by the title by publisher made me put on this article. I was not the hero. Most definitely not. In fact, I was the complete opposite of "the hero." I was the "un-hero." Who the hero was, is actually a quite discussed topic all over the world. But I will let you decide for yourself, who was the hero.
It all started one boring, lazy, summer day. It was 10:23 in the morning, and I was quietly creeping into my brothers room. With a fog horn. It doesn't take a genius to figure out the rest. By 11:00, I had been unceremoniously dumped in a dumpster outside of the YMCA. Regrettably, I was stuck there. I could have done several things at this point. I could have screamed for help, while plotting revenge against my brother. I could have shrieked like a girl, and pounded on the walls until I got out. I could have cried like a baby, and thrown trash around, making as much noise as possible. I did it all at once. I stopped after about 1 minuet. Well, you try screaming, plotting revenge, shrieking like a girl, pounding the walls, crying like a baby, and making as much noise as possible, all at one time. It is tiring! And, I heard a voice. Yes, I, Colin Smith heard a voice in the dumpster outside of the YMCA.
STOP! You may be on your way to come and pick me up, and drive me to the hospital immediately. Please refrain yourself. I don't need to go to the hospital. The voice wasn't telling me he was my dead ancestors. Nor was the voice telling me that I was about to be sucked up by aliens. The voice said
"OK Bob, we are ready to proceed with plan Pink Prancing Unicorn." You may still think that I am crazy. Please don't judge so quickly! I am not! Because, I know something you don't. I know, that the voice was coming from a walkie talkie.
I fished around for some time in the dumpster, until I found the walkie talkie. I decided to play along with my brothers prank. Once I finally found the walkie talkie, I talked into.
"Proceed." I said. To this day, I wish I had not made the grievous mistake of saying "proceed." Because as soon as I said that, the dumpster started to move. Terrified, I screamed in a terrible panic, afraid that I was going to be dumped into a trash truck, and my bones pulverised into dust. No such luck. I stopped moving up, and started moving forward. Bracing myself against the wall, I could hear screams of other people. Sounds of screeching trucks, and the sound of braking glass. The entire ride was a terrifying confusion movement, smelly trash being thrown in my face, and absolute lack of sense of direction. Finally, I was set down. I grabbed a stick, and knocked on the roof, trying to break out. All this time, Mr. Prancing Pink Unicorn was screaming
"NOT YET!" In the walkie talkie. Finally I broke out. The sounds of confusion and shouting that I had heard outside of the dumpster stopped. I heard nothing, as I climbed out. Finally, I could see over the edge of the dumpster. The sight was shocking. Several men dressed in black were holding guns up to people, who were dressed in fancy clothes. Outside of the building I was in, there were several police men. The sight of me, a young boy, coming out of a dumpster, holding a wooden stick with a banana peel delicately balanced on the tip, was enough to make the evil vagabonds stop. And that second delay was enough for the police to come in. I was hailed a hero! I had stopped one of the most daring bank robberies ever!
But I don't think I was a hero. The only time I ever accept the title of "Hero" is when my brother tries to take credit for the whole thing, since he threw me in the dumpster in the first place. That is the only time. Lets remember, that all I really did, was get thrown in a dumpster, answer a walkie talkie code, take a terrifying ride in a dumpster across main street, crash through glass doors, and stop a armed robbery. That is all.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Summer
So, summer is coming really soon, and I have been making plans for what to do. I was afraid I was going to be really bored. Beth might get a job, and who knows what MJ will take on, so I felt left out, and terribly afraid that this summer was going to be very very very very dull.
But then I had a brilliant revelation! *music*
OK, I had several. First of all, to start the summer, the Carlsons are coming out, and HOW COULD THAT POSSIBLY BE BORING?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
And then, I realized, that a week will be taken up with Camp Hope, and then in late august/early september, we will be on vacation. But, there is still time where I have the potential to be bored.
So I am going to do several things.
1. I am going to learn how to play the Guitar. We are borrowing one from a friend, that never stays in tune overnight, but it will work. And eric has promised to teach me.
2. I am going to make a massive book list. If you have any suggestions, please let me know. I am almost done with reading a historical fiction series from Grandma, that is absolutely amazing! So, I wanna read more historical fiction. So, send in book ideas! I wanna get a lot of reading done this summer!
3. I am going to work hard on piano. My piano teacher told me that I need to keep playing through the summer, so I will. I really like music, and playing the piano is deffinetly fun.
4. Whatever happens. Swimming at lakes, getting together with friends, the usual. I won't let this summer be boring.
So, if you all have any suggestions on what I should read, or do this summer, let me know!
Signing off
-KT
But then I had a brilliant revelation! *music*
OK, I had several. First of all, to start the summer, the Carlsons are coming out, and HOW COULD THAT POSSIBLY BE BORING?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
And then, I realized, that a week will be taken up with Camp Hope, and then in late august/early september, we will be on vacation. But, there is still time where I have the potential to be bored.
So I am going to do several things.
1. I am going to learn how to play the Guitar. We are borrowing one from a friend, that never stays in tune overnight, but it will work. And eric has promised to teach me.
2. I am going to make a massive book list. If you have any suggestions, please let me know. I am almost done with reading a historical fiction series from Grandma, that is absolutely amazing! So, I wanna read more historical fiction. So, send in book ideas! I wanna get a lot of reading done this summer!
3. I am going to work hard on piano. My piano teacher told me that I need to keep playing through the summer, so I will. I really like music, and playing the piano is deffinetly fun.
4. Whatever happens. Swimming at lakes, getting together with friends, the usual. I won't let this summer be boring.
So, if you all have any suggestions on what I should read, or do this summer, let me know!
Signing off
-KT
Monday, May 10, 2010
Love is not a victory march
"The only sound was the furious scratching of my pen, and the gentle breathing of everyone else. No, that wasn't really the only sound. The night was full of sounds. Aside from the typical sounds of the night; birds, wind, creaking, there was the sound of the night itself. Heavy and peacful. Still, and there. The sound of silence if you will. It was that sound that kept me awake. The Sound of Silence kept me awake. Maybe I WAS going crazy!"
I'm kinda hyper right now, and in a ranting and raving mood.
I am going to be perfectly honest to you. This post is going to be all about myself. It isn't really a change from the rest of my posts, but oh well.
MJ is getting ready to go to Running Start next school year. I am going to be left completely alone! Not really, but no older sisters at home all the time! I should be thrilled, but I am scared. Scared that I am going to be bored out of my mind, and the girls won't be there to tell me what to do, and to annoy me. It isn't like they are leaving for ever, but they are going to be gone for most of the day.
OK, so this post is going to be really random, and probably make no sense. Fair warning. Here it goes:
Aside from when the Carlsons are out, this summer could be extremely boring
I'm tired of feeling left out
ugh ugh ugh
yah
so
um
I get my braces off in a week!
Beth cut my bangs the other day!
You know what is really funny? OK, our friends, the Geyers moved to South Carolina a year ago. When they still lived in Washington, Mrs. Geyer gave me clothes from this her boss's kids. Well, I got some of those clothes yesterday, from Dr. Bacon, who is Mrs. Geyers dad. The clothes are so typical. Super small, brand names like abercrombie and aeropostale. Some of the clothes still have the price tag on them, and have never been worn! I wonder if they think I have a really bad sense of fashion, and send them to be, or they just randomly buy clothes, and then discard them.
The other day, I put a shirt on, and felt really skinny. I wasn't super skinny, but I felt fine! I was comfortable with how I was. Later I weighed myself, and was about 130. Great. I'm the heaviest I have ever been in my entire life, and I feel the skinniest. I am going crazy. Oh well :D I guess, I feel fine. I'm tired of TRYING to be skinny. I am not fat, I know that, but I am . . . .. sturdy.
Well, I need to go blow dry my hair, and my new bangs that Bethany cut the other day :)
"It's a separate peace
a place all on my own
I feel a little closer to home
I close my eyes
and block out the noise
it's just me
in my separate peace"
Bye!
-Katie
"Enough about me, what do you think about me?"
-I had you fooled for a sec, didn't I. You thought I was going to stop talking about myself! hahahahaha not a chance! ;)-
I'm kinda hyper right now, and in a ranting and raving mood.
I am going to be perfectly honest to you. This post is going to be all about myself. It isn't really a change from the rest of my posts, but oh well.
MJ is getting ready to go to Running Start next school year. I am going to be left completely alone! Not really, but no older sisters at home all the time! I should be thrilled, but I am scared. Scared that I am going to be bored out of my mind, and the girls won't be there to tell me what to do, and to annoy me. It isn't like they are leaving for ever, but they are going to be gone for most of the day.
OK, so this post is going to be really random, and probably make no sense. Fair warning. Here it goes:
Aside from when the Carlsons are out, this summer could be extremely boring
I'm tired of feeling left out
ugh ugh ugh
yah
so
um
I get my braces off in a week!
Beth cut my bangs the other day!
You know what is really funny? OK, our friends, the Geyers moved to South Carolina a year ago. When they still lived in Washington, Mrs. Geyer gave me clothes from this her boss's kids. Well, I got some of those clothes yesterday, from Dr. Bacon, who is Mrs. Geyers dad. The clothes are so typical. Super small, brand names like abercrombie and aeropostale. Some of the clothes still have the price tag on them, and have never been worn! I wonder if they think I have a really bad sense of fashion, and send them to be, or they just randomly buy clothes, and then discard them.
The other day, I put a shirt on, and felt really skinny. I wasn't super skinny, but I felt fine! I was comfortable with how I was. Later I weighed myself, and was about 130. Great. I'm the heaviest I have ever been in my entire life, and I feel the skinniest. I am going crazy. Oh well :D I guess, I feel fine. I'm tired of TRYING to be skinny. I am not fat, I know that, but I am . . . .. sturdy.
Well, I need to go blow dry my hair, and my new bangs that Bethany cut the other day :)
"It's a separate peace
a place all on my own
I feel a little closer to home
I close my eyes
and block out the noise
it's just me
in my separate peace"
Bye!
-Katie
"Enough about me, what do you think about me?"
-I had you fooled for a sec, didn't I. You thought I was going to stop talking about myself! hahahahaha not a chance! ;)-
Monday, April 19, 2010
See with your heart
So this morning I have been thinking about being blind. Losing your sight would be a very scary, terrifying thing. I am going to write about being blind. Right here. You all be my critics. Pretend it is me who is blind, in the same family, all the same things. Ok, here it goes.
I'm blind. No sight. Nothing. For the first time I have to rely completely on my other senses. You hear people talk about being blind. Your hearing gets sharper they say. Your smell better. That isn't completely true. I just listen more. I want to listen more. I can hear Nathan, when he walks with his stomping gait across the floor. I can even tell the twins apart by their walk, their breathing, their voice. I got in a car crash three months ago. Something hit me in the head, and when I woke up in the hospital a few hours later, I couldn't see. It's a small price to pay. The other driver was killed. I'll never see the other driver.
When we got back from the hospital, I decided I wouldn't act like a invalid. You know how in books, some people go into a downward spiral of pity. I refuse to do that. I won't even begin. What bothers me most, is the way my family is treating me. The first week was the worst. They were trying to treat e different. Telling me where everything is, guiding me, asking if they could help me. I appreciate their concern, but I need to be able to do this on my own. Finally, I exploded. "I'm not any different that I was a week ago! Stop treating me like I'm glass." We talked it out, and now they treat me normal. Nathan and the twins even try and sneak up on me when I am sitting down somewhere. But I can always here them. Nathan can't walk quietly to save his life. A lot of things I can't do anymore. Like read, and see the stars, or even se my family. But I can still feel the sun on my face, the rain on my skin. I listen to books a lot. Then, yesterday before Bethany went to school she suggested I try typing. It isn't that hard actually. I can feel when I have made a mistake, but I just leave it. I'll let someone else fix it later.
I can tell where I am in the house, or outside in our yard. Maybe it has helped living here for Fourteen years, but I can walk anywhere fairly confidently. Sometimes, I let my hand brush against the side of the wall to guide me. Nathan says I look so confident, he sometimes forgets I am blind. The Watts house is easy to navigate also. I know it all so well. School is a lot of listening. I listen in class, and if it is possible say the problems out loud. When we go out in public, I use a walking stick to navigate. I can't see the people staring at me, and I know they do. I used to do it. They can't see me I would think. But, how wrong I was! I can feel their gaze. I know they are watching me. But it doesn't bother me. Someday, one of them might go blind, and then they would understand. Close your eyes for just a minuet. Pretend you are blind. Listen to everything around you. What can you hear? I can hear the ticking of a clock, Nathan Allison and Sarah in the family room playing. The oven timer is beeping. MJ is sitting on the table. I can hear her opening a book. She's talking about it, and I am listening with half a year. I can hear my own breathing. I can hear the freeway in the back ground. A airplane flies overhead.
I will never see again. But I can still see. With my fingers, my ears, and I can tell the pain, sorrow, happiness, anything behind someone's voice. I understand more than I ever did when I could see. Being blind didn't make me loose my sight. I gained it. I can see better than I ever could before. And now I am typing for the first time, and sharing the story of blindness with everyone else.
Well, I'm not really blind;) I did type most of that with my eyes closed though. Well, have a nice week everyone!
I'm blind. No sight. Nothing. For the first time I have to rely completely on my other senses. You hear people talk about being blind. Your hearing gets sharper they say. Your smell better. That isn't completely true. I just listen more. I want to listen more. I can hear Nathan, when he walks with his stomping gait across the floor. I can even tell the twins apart by their walk, their breathing, their voice. I got in a car crash three months ago. Something hit me in the head, and when I woke up in the hospital a few hours later, I couldn't see. It's a small price to pay. The other driver was killed. I'll never see the other driver.
When we got back from the hospital, I decided I wouldn't act like a invalid. You know how in books, some people go into a downward spiral of pity. I refuse to do that. I won't even begin. What bothers me most, is the way my family is treating me. The first week was the worst. They were trying to treat e different. Telling me where everything is, guiding me, asking if they could help me. I appreciate their concern, but I need to be able to do this on my own. Finally, I exploded. "I'm not any different that I was a week ago! Stop treating me like I'm glass." We talked it out, and now they treat me normal. Nathan and the twins even try and sneak up on me when I am sitting down somewhere. But I can always here them. Nathan can't walk quietly to save his life. A lot of things I can't do anymore. Like read, and see the stars, or even se my family. But I can still feel the sun on my face, the rain on my skin. I listen to books a lot. Then, yesterday before Bethany went to school she suggested I try typing. It isn't that hard actually. I can feel when I have made a mistake, but I just leave it. I'll let someone else fix it later.
I can tell where I am in the house, or outside in our yard. Maybe it has helped living here for Fourteen years, but I can walk anywhere fairly confidently. Sometimes, I let my hand brush against the side of the wall to guide me. Nathan says I look so confident, he sometimes forgets I am blind. The Watts house is easy to navigate also. I know it all so well. School is a lot of listening. I listen in class, and if it is possible say the problems out loud. When we go out in public, I use a walking stick to navigate. I can't see the people staring at me, and I know they do. I used to do it. They can't see me I would think. But, how wrong I was! I can feel their gaze. I know they are watching me. But it doesn't bother me. Someday, one of them might go blind, and then they would understand. Close your eyes for just a minuet. Pretend you are blind. Listen to everything around you. What can you hear? I can hear the ticking of a clock, Nathan Allison and Sarah in the family room playing. The oven timer is beeping. MJ is sitting on the table. I can hear her opening a book. She's talking about it, and I am listening with half a year. I can hear my own breathing. I can hear the freeway in the back ground. A airplane flies overhead.
I will never see again. But I can still see. With my fingers, my ears, and I can tell the pain, sorrow, happiness, anything behind someone's voice. I understand more than I ever did when I could see. Being blind didn't make me loose my sight. I gained it. I can see better than I ever could before. And now I am typing for the first time, and sharing the story of blindness with everyone else.
Well, I'm not really blind;) I did type most of that with my eyes closed though. Well, have a nice week everyone!
Monday, April 05, 2010
oh Life, why be so confusing?
So, my grandpa has a brain tumor. When I first heard, I was kinda grounded. My feet would not move if I wanted them to. It hit me like a wave, almost taking my breath away, and making me want to cry. I was going back and forth from I can't believe this is happening, to Oh, yah, my grandpa has a brain tumor.
It is most likely non-cancerous. They are fairly positive it is. It is about 2 inches big, and they are going to have surgery to get it out. They don't have a date yet, but probably with in the next month. It is very slow growing.
This whole thing has made me value life, and think more about time. I take for granted this house, my family. Someday, i am going to grow up, and get married. I won't live here forever. I won't forever be in "the house that built me." I was think about a specific memory I have. I was 6 or 7, and think about how I would be 14 in 7-8 years. In my brain, 14 was a completely different person. Mature, beautiful, talented, and knowing where she is, and what she is doing in the world. Boy did I have it wrong. I don't seem much different than when I was 6. Still me, still searching, and still wanting to be older. Sure, things have changed, but not that much.
Life is a blessing. Every breath is a gift. Don't waste it, don't take it for granted.
Have a great week everyone!
OH, and please pray for all my grandparents :)
It is most likely non-cancerous. They are fairly positive it is. It is about 2 inches big, and they are going to have surgery to get it out. They don't have a date yet, but probably with in the next month. It is very slow growing.
This whole thing has made me value life, and think more about time. I take for granted this house, my family. Someday, i am going to grow up, and get married. I won't live here forever. I won't forever be in "the house that built me." I was think about a specific memory I have. I was 6 or 7, and think about how I would be 14 in 7-8 years. In my brain, 14 was a completely different person. Mature, beautiful, talented, and knowing where she is, and what she is doing in the world. Boy did I have it wrong. I don't seem much different than when I was 6. Still me, still searching, and still wanting to be older. Sure, things have changed, but not that much.
Life is a blessing. Every breath is a gift. Don't waste it, don't take it for granted.
Have a great week everyone!
OH, and please pray for all my grandparents :)
Monday, March 29, 2010
Let the rain fall down . . .
So, my grandparents on my Dads side are suffering from health issues. I spent three hours at their house yesterday, and Grandma is very miserable. The doctors aren't sure what is wrong, and it would take me forever to explain her symptoms. Just please, pray for her. My grandpa possible had a stroke on saturday, and is going to the doctor today as well. Pray for them both. Pray that they will get rest, be able to eat, and get better. Thanks!
BTW, it is raining so much!!!! It must be spring!
BTW, it is raining so much!!!! It must be spring!
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Amazing Grace, How sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me!
I am living in a bubble of happiness!
I went skiing on monday, and it was so fun! There is something completely breath taking about going down a pure white mountain, in stunning speeds, with your feet on two long sticks. Makes sense, doesn't it! ;)
Really, it was fun. Fearless. I felt fearless. Not really, because I was nervous and scared, but I was ready to give it my best shot. And you have to be fearless to a certain extent, when you push yourself off the very tip of the hill. I went to bed feeling like I was skiing.
More of my joy has to do with one of my absolute best friends. Her name is Winsome, and she goes to my church. I've known her for ever, and her b-day is two months before mine. Last sunday we were talking, and she said she had been saved! We talked for a long time, and I went to bed so happy. She has been sending me sermons, and we have been talking a lot. It is so happy.
Then, last night MJ came into our room rather late, and said we needed to talk. We talked about everything. We had a good long discussion about salvation, and I told her I was saved. We were both really happy. I never really have told anyone before, that I am saved, but I guess I should start. I don't have a date, or specific time. I have just been learning a lot, and growing in the past year.
I haven't told Mom and Dad yet, and I know I should. Just, how do I start that conversation???????
Then MJ and I went on to talk about boys, and whether or not it is fine to email them, ect. ect. We only talked for like 30 minuets, but I know we will talk more. We haven't had a good discussion for so long, because she has been really busy, and both of us falling asleep quickly at night. (or at least she is falling asleep quickly ;) ) So, it was really good to talk. I miss both my sisters, they are busy, and gone a lot, but this is growing up, right?
Beth is in the middle of studying for Finals, and is a little grumpy :) But I can understand, and am giving her as much space as possible. I would love to talk to her though. It is hard to get used to having siblings in school, but I have gotten used to it, and when MJ goes next year, I will know better how to give them lots of space, and not bother them when they are doing school. It isn't like Beth is a sensitive time bomb, I just don't want to annoy her.
We have our Youth Group/bible study tonight, and I am really excited! I can't wait to learn more, and to have fellowship with all my friends!
Well, it's time to let hit the Publish Post button, and let all my friends know I'm saved. This is a big step for me, even though it isn't really that big a deal to tell everyone. Well, here it goes. *squeezes eyes shut* *takes deep breath* *pushes button*
I went skiing on monday, and it was so fun! There is something completely breath taking about going down a pure white mountain, in stunning speeds, with your feet on two long sticks. Makes sense, doesn't it! ;)
Really, it was fun. Fearless. I felt fearless. Not really, because I was nervous and scared, but I was ready to give it my best shot. And you have to be fearless to a certain extent, when you push yourself off the very tip of the hill. I went to bed feeling like I was skiing.
More of my joy has to do with one of my absolute best friends. Her name is Winsome, and she goes to my church. I've known her for ever, and her b-day is two months before mine. Last sunday we were talking, and she said she had been saved! We talked for a long time, and I went to bed so happy. She has been sending me sermons, and we have been talking a lot. It is so happy.
Then, last night MJ came into our room rather late, and said we needed to talk. We talked about everything. We had a good long discussion about salvation, and I told her I was saved. We were both really happy. I never really have told anyone before, that I am saved, but I guess I should start. I don't have a date, or specific time. I have just been learning a lot, and growing in the past year.
I haven't told Mom and Dad yet, and I know I should. Just, how do I start that conversation???????
Then MJ and I went on to talk about boys, and whether or not it is fine to email them, ect. ect. We only talked for like 30 minuets, but I know we will talk more. We haven't had a good discussion for so long, because she has been really busy, and both of us falling asleep quickly at night. (or at least she is falling asleep quickly ;) ) So, it was really good to talk. I miss both my sisters, they are busy, and gone a lot, but this is growing up, right?
Beth is in the middle of studying for Finals, and is a little grumpy :) But I can understand, and am giving her as much space as possible. I would love to talk to her though. It is hard to get used to having siblings in school, but I have gotten used to it, and when MJ goes next year, I will know better how to give them lots of space, and not bother them when they are doing school. It isn't like Beth is a sensitive time bomb, I just don't want to annoy her.
We have our Youth Group/bible study tonight, and I am really excited! I can't wait to learn more, and to have fellowship with all my friends!
Well, it's time to let hit the Publish Post button, and let all my friends know I'm saved. This is a big step for me, even though it isn't really that big a deal to tell everyone. Well, here it goes. *squeezes eyes shut* *takes deep breath* *pushes button*
Monday, March 01, 2010
Hmm . . . What should I write about?
I really have no idea what to write about. Nothing really exciting going on. No terrible problems in my life, nothing to talk about. I read Passion and Purity by Elisabeth Elliot yesterday. It is a really good book, and if you haven't read it, you should.
UM . . .. . . I hope you all have had an amazing week, and the next one is more amazing! If I have anything to write about, I will. Sorry about my dead brain!
UM . . .. . . I hope you all have had an amazing week, and the next one is more amazing! If I have anything to write about, I will. Sorry about my dead brain!
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
I hope you Dance!!!
Hey everyone! Sorry it took me so long to put up a new post. I have been busy, AND have had this awful cold for a while. So, I don't really feel like writing everything, so here are the lyrics to a song called I hope you Dance.
I hope you never lose your sense of wonder,
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger,
May you never take one single breath for granted,
GOD forbid love ever leave you empty handed,
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean,
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens,
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance.
I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance,
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Livin' might mean takin' chances, but they're worth takin',
Lovin' might be a mistake but it's worth makin',
Don't let some hell bent heart leave you bitter,
When you come close to sellin' out reconsider,
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance.
(Time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along,
Tell me who wants to look back on their years and wonder where those years have gone.)
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean,
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens,
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.
Dance....I hope you dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance..
(Time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along
Tell me who wants to look back on their years and wonder where those years have gone)
The tune to the song is really cool. Ok, I gotta go and blow my nose. <3
I hope you never lose your sense of wonder,
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger,
May you never take one single breath for granted,
GOD forbid love ever leave you empty handed,
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean,
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens,
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance.
I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance,
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Livin' might mean takin' chances, but they're worth takin',
Lovin' might be a mistake but it's worth makin',
Don't let some hell bent heart leave you bitter,
When you come close to sellin' out reconsider,
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance.
(Time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along,
Tell me who wants to look back on their years and wonder where those years have gone.)
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean,
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens,
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.
Dance....I hope you dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance..
(Time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along
Tell me who wants to look back on their years and wonder where those years have gone)
The tune to the song is really cool. Ok, I gotta go and blow my nose. <3
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
. . .and after the storm, sunshine
So, today I woke up, pulled myself out of bed, went downstairs, read a little before I started my school, and then ate breakfast. I did some school until Beth was gone, and the school kids had been picked up by the bus. Then I went outside and exercised. It was exhausting, but afterwards, everything feels great. I feel good, and I am wide awake! Excercizing always makes me feel that way.
So, I hear that our cousins in New Jersey are getting tons of snow! I really wish that we had a lot of snow, but it seems like the only snow we'll get this year is the powder that I added water to, and put on our table. It is dying now, (I need to add more water) and it is very pathetic looking. Oh well, we had lots of snow last year, and for that I am thankful
Not much to talk about. My birthday is in a few days, and my family wants to get away Sunday afternoon to Monday evening. But, we haven't found a good destination yet, so I am not sure if we will be able to make that work. I wanted to have some friends over on Saturday for a party, but all those friends will be at a wedding this saturday, and next saturday my cousin is going to a fancy co-op event, and my older sisters to a community dance. So, I don't know if I will end up doing anything for my B-day. I never have had a big party, so I guess I shall just wait till my 15th for a party.
Thanks for reading my blog everyone! Have a week!
(and a great Valentines)
Signing out!
-KT Claire
So, I hear that our cousins in New Jersey are getting tons of snow! I really wish that we had a lot of snow, but it seems like the only snow we'll get this year is the powder that I added water to, and put on our table. It is dying now, (I need to add more water) and it is very pathetic looking. Oh well, we had lots of snow last year, and for that I am thankful
Not much to talk about. My birthday is in a few days, and my family wants to get away Sunday afternoon to Monday evening. But, we haven't found a good destination yet, so I am not sure if we will be able to make that work. I wanted to have some friends over on Saturday for a party, but all those friends will be at a wedding this saturday, and next saturday my cousin is going to a fancy co-op event, and my older sisters to a community dance. So, I don't know if I will end up doing anything for my B-day. I never have had a big party, so I guess I shall just wait till my 15th for a party.
Thanks for reading my blog everyone! Have a week!
(and a great Valentines)
Signing out!
-KT Claire
Wednesday, February 03, 2010
Heart and Soul
I have been taking Piano lessons again for the past few weeks. I am playing two songs. One, is Southampton from the Titanic, the other Rebel Heart, by the Corrs. Piano is my favorite subject in school l ;) I like to play, even if I am not that good.
Southampton is a gorgeous song, but I can't get it to translate onto the piano. I don't want to just play the song, I want it to be the song! I pour my heart into it, to get it to have the right elements. Adventure, hope, bitter-sweetness, and that sad happy part at the end. Rebel Heart. Everything, everything that has been bothering me lately I try to pour into the song. I know that sounds SUPER strange, and really stupid, but I make the song translate into who I am. Anywho, I can't explain it very well, but somehow the songs never sound right. I am sure to someone listening, they would sound just dandy, (except for the wrong notes) but to me, it sounds empty. Just a song.
Listen to Rebel Heart sometime, if you haven't heard it before. It is a great song.
Sometimes, I feel so fake. All the stories running around in my head, well they are me. The brave heroic girls, the adventures, the everything. I am those characters. But that isn't who I am. I am trying to put my stories aside. Just live in real life, and embrace this family, this house, this city, these friends, and not want a adventure. Just be me. But who am I?
On a MUCH different note, yesterday Sarah was walking downstairs after getting help from mom, and she looked sideways. Her neck started to hurt, and got all tight. She couldn't even move her neck for a few hours cause it hurt SO bad. She got better, and even went to dance last night, but this morning it is still pretty sore, and she is on Mom's bed again. She can move her neck, just it hurts. But, being 9, she doesn't have much patience. So, I am going to keep her company upstairs, and I am sure Allison will help me as well.
I hope you all have a amazing week. I appreciate you all for reading my posts!!
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Dreams
I have a key that I wear as a necklace. It says dreams on it. It seems to symbolize something. I'm not sure what. I have so many dreams.
First I have the dream of acting, or singing. I love being on stage. It gives me such thrill. Some people have told me I have a stage presence. I can feel it sometimes. It almost makes my finger tips tingle. I want to be on a stage, and look out at blackness, and know that there is a crowd there, watching me perform. The one problem is I can't sing, and I have never tested my acting.
Second is writing. I have so many stories swimming around in my head. All kinds you can imagine. Fantasy, historical fiction, modern day, pirates, princess's, adventure. Everything. I imagine that they are like wisps of smoke, maybe green or purple smoke, all twirling around in my head. They come to me at random times. Sometimes in dreams, sometimes when I am reading, sometimes when I see something, hear someone say something. I am not sure how it happens, but they develop. They become a famous story. But it never happens. I never get it down on paper before the next story takes over.
I am inspired so easily. I am listening to the Titanic music right now. It makes me happy, and sad all at the same time. How can music express itself so well? It just makes my heart feel happy. Then heavy. Then about to burst.
I am really tired right now from a long babysitting job, so you will have to forgive my drama. :D
Music effects how I write so much. The song I am listening to right now, Take Her to Sea, Mr. Murdoch, from the titanic says so much to me. Hope, happiness, a challenge. When they set sail in the titanic, a lot of people wanted to prove the world wrong. They thought that God couldn't even stop them. God did. With a iceberg.
Well, I have nothing more to say. Have a great week everyone!!
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Amazing Grace and sleepless nights
I am SO exhausted. I can't get much sleep. It takes forever to fall asleep. I know 11:00 or 11:30 isn't late for all of you, but for me it is. Get in bed at 9:00-9:30ish, talk with MJ, read or journal until 10:00, and then lay down. Wait until 10:30 .. . . . still awake. Go to the bathroom, just to stand up, and not feel completely useless. Go back into bed. Lay there, frustrated with myself. Tomorrow will be awful. Stay up for a little while longer. Switch from side to side. Finally, lay on my back (thats my, I am so not getting any sleep tonight position) Then, as I stare at the dark ceiling and listen to MJ's breathing, I might fall asleep. Last night wasn't as bad, I only stayed up till 10:45ish. I don't know what is wrong with me. Its not like I am thinking about anything. I try not to think of anything at all. Just listen to my breathing, my own heart beat. But it doesn't work. And then when I get up at 7:30 in the morning, I am so tired, and can barely pull myself out of bed. By the time I get to friday, I am so tired, and I don't even want to stay up late.
So, I lay in bed late into the night, wishing I had a iTouch, or laptop so I could spend my wasted hours typing blog posts, or writing long pointless emails to people.
Life is so confusing. Growing up is so hard, and I am in the thick of it. I have friends my age, but I never really talk to them about my big problems. I don't even know how to put my problems to words. They are just there.
Amazing Grace just sounds comforting. I say it in my head when I am trying to sleep. Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound. But I spend those sleepless nights wondering if I will be able to finish the hymn in my own heart.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
I am sorry . . .
This is long over due. I don't think anyone really reads my blog. Oh well, I can keep talking to myself forever, and maybe some good will come of it someday. Print these out, and I will have instant journaling!
I think as you get older Journaling becomes much more important. In fact I know that. Lately I have been journaling a lot. I write some stories in there, and I write feelings, and all those little things that are so apart of my life.
Well, for being so overdue i don't have much to write about .. . see you all later!
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